Hey welcome to episode #7 of Yennage Can't Cook! This Sunday I decided to forgo my usual McDonalds meal and eat a nice healthy homecooked meal instead even though I'd eaten a large lunch. Now I saw Richey's tasty looking pizza pockets and figured "hey if I can burn cupcakes I'm sure I can burn this too!" so without further ado here's my version called patented pizza pockets.

Step 1 -- Here's my ingredients:

From left we've got Tesco seeded tortilla wraps (aka the bad kind), Cool Original Doritos (what the hell even is cool original?), Tesco Value Garlic Bread, Pizza Express Margherita (best pizza in the UK) and the obligatory coke (I was thirsty ok!)

Step 2 -- Waste no time in unpacking your reasonably priced garlic bread and whack it straight in the oven:

Protip: Use a baking tray that isn't ridiculously undersized for a far easier cooking process

Step 3 -- After about 8 minutes (I don't use a timer) of cooking the garlic bread, go ahead and whack in the pizza

Protip: Flip your garlic bread before taking the picture to hide the fact that its quite badly burnt!

Step 4 -- When the pizza is about burnt, crush some doritos on top using your bear fist (no seriously I don't mean bare fist.)

Protip: Put a stop to bullying by wearing your blue coloured "Beat Bullying" wristband from like 5 years ago

Step 5 -- Drop the garlic bread onto the pizza as well!

Protip: Use your hand to obscure the burnt centre of the pizza in the first picture and then a garlic bread in the next picture (that's right I'm getting smarter at hiding my burnt food)

Step 6 -- Sit your pizza and garlic bread on top of a wrap and then put another wrap on top of the pizza (obviously add coke too )

Protip: Don't actually add coca cola to tortilla wraps, it makes them taste awful

Step 7 -- Whack the whole lot into the oven and back it for an arbitrary amount of time and then lift it out!

Protip: Despite what you may believe, tortilla wraps do become very hot after just 1 minute in the oven and will still burn you if you try and pick it up

Step 8 -- Cut the whole dealie in half to showcase its brilliance!

Protip: Loose doritos and over excitement to take a picture can lead to some spillages in the kitchen

So yeah that was a... different meal... Basically the whole combination of coke + garlic + pizza + seeded tortilla didn't really work and after eating almost the whole lot I have to admit this was the first YCC that made me feel genuinely unwell for a little while although I'm not sure whether it was the taste or just the sheer amount of carbs (I think)